22 March 2009

Jerusha is disillusioned!

My new favorite quote is by Robert Byrne, a man I currently feel a very close kinship to. I'm sure he learned this the hard way too.

"In order to preserve self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat." (Smart man!)

And particularly more so to lie.

And frankly, even when it's got nothing to do with preserving your self-respect, but because even if you don't, people will lie to you anyway. They will find reasons and excuses to lie to you because people have such deep inclination to lie that they will do it even when it's completely unnecessary. And even when there are no major different consequences of telling a lie or the truth, they will still choose to pick the first because it comes so much more naturally to them.

It's stupid to be truthful. It's important to lie to people because it's just plain nasty to lie to people so people who do lie deserve to have the same nastiness back. And why should anyone strive so hard to be truthful anyway? It's obvious that no one can be truthful to you! Why should I make any effort to be real when the world and the people around me are ALL false?

I'm not talking about the occasional 'Oh I have to take my dog to the vet and therefore have to leave work early while I'm really just spending the afternoon with my boyfriend' kind of lie. I'm talking about the kind of lie that has the potential to hurt you because of the simple fact that you are being lied to kind of lie. The really mean and sucky and ugly kind.

I only owe it to God to be truthful, and with that I don't even have a choice because I can't lie to God anyway. And as for the rest, I am henceforth going to adopt a new outlook to life - I will sprinkle a little bit of love and lie everywhere I go. And neither I nor the people I lie to will be none the worse for it. It'll just make things fairer and even. I'm going to turn lying into an art form.

And incidentally - it's so good to not be in school anymore! I know what my English teacher would have said if I had turned this post in as an exam paper. I can just see it -

"Jerusha, how many times does the words 'lie' and 'people' appear in this post?"

(trembling knowing I am in trouble) "I don't know Sir.."

"Count the lies" :P

(I count - but I'm not really counting now - so let's pick a random number - 22)

"22 times Sir"

"Do you think that's alright? Do you think it's okay that you used 'lie' 22 times here? What have we learned about repeated words and using the same word over and over again?"

***mumble mumble***

"What do you think of your paper? Do you think you've done a good job?"

"No Sir"

"Why then did you not try to make it better?"

(Lying) "I was not feeling well Sir"

"Would you like to work on it again and show me you can do better?"

(Lying) "Yes Sir"

"Here, take it back and work on it tonight, and don't come and tell me you were not feeling well again!"

(Lying) "Thank you Sir"

I half wish I was in this situation now just so I can tell him no I'm not really thankful and no I don't want to work on it anymore, and I think it's okay that I used the word 'lie' 22 times and that the same word being repeated many times over doesn't bother me and I'd do it again and I hate Celine Dion and I hate your moustache and even though you think it's unfeminine for schoolgirls to listen to Metallica I still listen to them everyday!

He was okay. School was okay. We learned useful things. But damn, don't you hate it that they tried to tell you what you should like and MUST NOT like, define your tastes in music and clothes and life in general and your overall opinion of people and also try to act as your religious teachers!

They did need a bit of lying to.


illusionaire said...

hehe i bial pa in dawt a hrilh che a ni maw? :-) A va pawi ve. *hugzzz*

Lying is alright by my books as long as they dont matter or dont hurt if the truth comes out. But it is most important to start any relationships honestly. Coz if he/she doesnt like you because of that, its okhayyy. Move on. But later if he/she finds out about it AFTER you have started the relationship, then that is SERIOUS and it is TOUGH to move on then.

Honestly, that is my mantra. And believe me, I have some really dark past but am ready to spill them all out to the person I fancy.

illusionaire said...

Let illusionaire de-disillusion you. lolz.

Ps. Just wondering, were you thinking of using the word "disillusion" or "delusion"? :-) The latter makes more sense with the tone of your post, me thinks.

Jerusha said...

Kim - nope, not my boyfriend. Just people in my life that I thought I could trust completely. I feel kind of stupid because they were not big lies, but it still hurts when you think you can trust them and you've always been completely honest with them and you think they have been honest with you too but you find out they really were not.

Jerusha said...

And disillusion was what I was thinking of, delusion seems more grammatically apt I agree because of my huge error in belief, but I like disillusion better, because I was under the illusion that people could be truthful and real (bad), but I've finally been deprived of that stupid illusion and now am wiser!

Anonymous said...

I was hoping for more content and rantings on the subject, but I guess it'll do.
Lies are something which I can bear, cos' I pride myself in being able to detect it, later if not sooner, people lie, all the time, and its no surprise with the lies we have to deal with everyday.
But there's one thing which I find hard to accept, is being unreliable. You rely on a friend and he totally screws you over, you lend somebody a helping hand and they ignore you when you're in need, (doesn't matter how much they begged you when they were in the same situation). Contrary to Jewel's "..in the end, only kindness matters..", I guess what matters is cooking up a good lie next time someone asks you for help.

Jerusha said...

LOL @ blackstred - "what matters is cooking up a good lie next time someone asks you for help." I can't stop giggling, yet I can see how this makes sense. It's smart to be able to detect lies, it makes you safe, and also more tolerant of lying people and therefore generally untouched. It's stupid to be so blind, and I guess it's that person's fault in the first place anyway for failing to see through it...

wonderboy said...

i think i'm stupid (thats what others around me thinks of me)because i don't know how to lie even for a very small things!!!

looked them straight in the eye an tell them a complete lie....still can't able to do this!!!

nyway, you learn a new lesson and thats good for you, keep up!! lol