18 July 2011

What would you do with a billion dollars?

"What would you do if you found a treasure worth billions of dollars?" "What is the first thing you would buy if someone suddenly came and gave you a hundred billion dollars?" Do you and your friends ever ask each other those questions?

Me and my friends do that a lot. We'd sit and dream of a millionaire, billionaire, zillionaire life - starting with how we'd get the money - lottery, anonymous donor, long lost filthy rich relative type person, saving a filthy rich type person's life who would then bestow us with some parts of his fortune in gratitude (or in its entirety after he's dead because this is an old man and he doesn't want to give it to his kids because they're all either dead or dead rotten and doesn't love this dear old old man). I usually see myself saving this man from a gang of thugs trying to rob him.

I don't know how this last part will work in reality though. First of all, I don't know any filthy rich type person who routinely puts himself in jeopardy so I might get the chance to save his life. And even if I do meet an old man that meets both criteria, just between you and me, I am doubtful about my ability to ward off his attackers :/

Anyway, what was I saying...oh yeah..me and friends and our dreams of becoming rich. Despite the endless dreaming, none of us would ever be able to clearly come up with anything they want to do with the money besides some talk of designer shoes and walk-in closets. I guess it's just too overwhelming even hypothetically for us to contemplate. Orpi always says she'll just go buy an ice-cream and think about what she wants to do with the change over a big sundae.

After cancer though, I know now exactly what I would want to do with the money (other than taking my entire family for a round the world trip).

I will buy a PET-CT scan machine. Personally a machine I loathe and hate and whose very sight feels me with dread and dismay and even some amount of terror, but despite all its unpleasantness, something that the state with the highest cancer rate in the country shouldn't be without.

And also something I'm lucky enough to have easy access to because I don't live in Mizoram, but back there, it's all very different.

And I want it for Mizoram because we need it. Not to scare anyone, but I think we Mizos have something defective in our genes that makes us more susceptible to cancer. I know lifestyle, diet etc and all that come into play too but I really believe we do have some weak genes. I guess you can't just get only awesomeness genes :)

After I found out about my melanoma and thyroid cancer, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer less than a month later, and since then, I can count on several fingers the amount of people who have been diagnosed (and even died, some in the space of a couple of months from detection).

One of these newly diagnosed is an 8 year old kid I met once in a village a year or two back, playing outside his threadbare house. (Just imagine the coincidence - two 'healthy at the time' strangers just talking while inside both our bodies, nasty cancer cells were already probably plotting their evil plans for us! And both getting diagnosed within a few months to each other).

I met him only once but we had a common interest in dogs so we chatted for a bit about his new puppy. I want that puppy to grow up together with his master and live a long healthy life together. I want this 12 year old girl I heard about who lost a leg because of bone cancer to grow up to be a healthy woman and wear pretty heels on both feet.

I especially want mothers, like my own mom, to live and beat cancer. Because without them, their children's lives would not make sense. Because if mothers die, their children die with them in a way. In that one life gone, several perish along with it.

And for these to happen, we need early detection. In Mizoram, a lot of cancer cases are detected too late. Maybe that girl could have avoided having to have her legs amputated if they'd found out about it sooner. The 8 year old will have a better chance of living that life with his dog if his cancer is at an early stage. I believe there were many people that would still be alive today if their cancers had been detected earlier. So early diagnosis and treatment is one of the main things we need to focus on. And that's where the Frankenstein machine will help.

There will be lots of work to do but just having this machine will be a big step for us I think. A lot of poor people who can't afford to travel for much-needed tests will be able to easily get them at home. It will help our doctors do a better job. But mostly I want it for the poor people. Like the little boy. Dealing with cancer is terrible enough, to have to deal with the staggering costs involved sucks in a major way.

Apparently the PET-CT machine costs around 2.6 to 4 million USD. Which means I would have plenty of money left. I will build a cancer hospital, hire the best oncologists in the country, equip it with fancy labs, and then work out how in the world we'll be able to make it all work for poor people and keep it running :)

It costs around Rs 25000 - Rs 30000 per scan where I get mine done (Apollo). It's pretty expensive but luckily for me, this is one thing my insurance company pays for without any hassle. But it doesn't matter in any case because for the duration of this post, I am the opposite of poor. I am a multi-billionaire :)

Now how do we get this machine, and make it available for everyone and not have to charge that kind of amount for whoever can't afford it?

08 July 2011

Old Letters

I'm in the middle of heavy duty packing (moving to a new flat) but I have to quickly post this one before I stash it away again. Unearthed old treasures, and by that I mean of course old hand-written letters, way before the internet came along and ruined everything!

This lovely letter is around 5+ years old I think (forget what I said about the internet :P.) I used to be the big boss of all the neighborhood kids back home. So naturally when their big boss who teaches them inappropriate songs and make them eat parents-banned products went away, they wrote me relentlessly. I was missed! :)

This one is from a kid called Peka, the then 6 year old son of one of our neighbors.

hi,

Aumami

how are you?

My name is Vanlalpeka

I am six years old

I am class-I

I go to school at ar-ellschool

I bring to you Nihawichi

My favorite fruite is Grape.
Purple
From Peka

Good by Dragon-ball Zee

(I used to promise them riches and wealth if they wrote me in English, this is one of Peka's attempt to ensure I return home with a Spiderman figure for him. And apparently he'd sent me some sunflower seeds along with the letter.)

Doesn't that warm your heart! I have more, funny ones where they tell me about their cats, or their neighbor's cats, or the dog that lives down the street. I'll share those too if I can find them.

(And my packing is going nowhere! Too many old letters to read...)

05 July 2011

Cupcakes Vs. Male Strippers/Nepali Sex/Call Girls

Wow! Someone out there is crayyzayyyy for Nepali sex!

I'm just writing down this quick post because I am so AMAZED by the amount of people searching for Nepali sex on the internet. I mean I can totally understand a more mainstream search like Asian/Latina/or whatever porn but Nepali? That's like searching for 'toilet habits of the Olmec civilization' or 'how to tickle a hammerhead.' So niched, I wouldn't expect a lot of people outside of India to even be aware of the presence of Nepalis. But they are, and how keenly too!

And how do I know this? Because my blog stats show me tons of leads coming in from people searching for Nepali sex every single day. All related to my Nepali sex post (by the way you shouldn't click on the link if you're looking for real Nepali porn).

There are people searching for 'Nepali sex' every single day from every continent! Well, not exactly. I just love my hyperboles :D To be truthful, Antartica doesn't seem to give a damn. But perhaps only because the penguins there haven't yet figured out that fishing isn't the only way to waste one's time.

Now in the context of this post, if we were to say what the opposite of Antartica is, it would be the Middle East. Saudi Arabia to be more precise. And this is not one person. The searches are coming in from different regions of SA. And we also see some homegrown searches there too from Kathmandu.

I haven't checked but I'm guessing the thumbnail from my blog is still on that porn site. What mystifies me is how it got there. Did a human reviewer scan the site and decide that the guys in the picture look Nepali? But I find it unlikely. Was it a bot that has been taught how to recognise Nepali features? I'm mystified.

And another trend that is forever on the rise is male strippers - people looking for male strippers as well as male strippers looking for a client. Do you know I still get offers from unattractive sounding men? (Is it too much to ask if I want my strippers to have a stripper body AND is not a virtual stranger to punctuations and capital letters?). And these offers despite that blog post now being under layers and dusty layers of other clothed posts.

Closely following these is the eternal hunt for the 'sexy call girl blog.' Who is this call girl blogger? I'm almost tempted to do a search to find this mysterious person but I have packing to do so will leave this for later.

So anyway, I'm a little sad that most visitors to my blog are really just looking for Nepali sex and male strippers and call girls when all I'd really love is for them to read about how I baked a cupcake for the first time. Baking can be really exciting too..just not sexually but it's exciting in all other manners of exciting you know :) Or how thrilling it is to eat raw pork uterus.

Well such is life! I wish all you ardent seekers of Nepali sex and other such things the best in your endeavours. And I again sincerely apologise for the false leads. May your search lead you to the right destination. Eventually.