24 May 2010

Where's Freud when you need him?!

Waaahh! I am sooo scared!! And I'm not being a cry baby, this is really, truly frightening!

One night last week, I had a dream about being in an airplane with my friends. And it was a happy dream, we were having fun and then it was suddenly night, everything was dark and as I looked out the window, I saw the wing was on fire, and then there was fire inside, and the plane was veering off in some weird angle and I knew I was going to die in a plane crash and I was filled with such intense fear it woke me up, and I woke up with my heart pounding.

The dream made me a bit uncomfortable, but I put it down to me being over excited about our upcoming Japan trip and went back to sleep and didn't think much about it the next day.

Then this Saturday morning, I had another disturbing dream. I have this stalker who gives me missed calls at odd hours. This Saturday morning he picked 5:30-ish to give me a call and woke me up. I got up, went to the bathroom, and got back into bed and almost immediately fell asleep again. And dreamt.

I was again in a plane with my friends, cheerful, lots of chatter, lots of laughing. As we were taking off, the plane instead of climbing higher started to go down, and we thought we were landing again for some reason so we were all a little scared but we were all like "Oh lucky they found something was wrong before we were too high up in the air. Now we can still land and they'll fix it and we'll be okay."

But as we were landing, the plane was skidding all over the place and it was shaking and rattling and we were just going faster and faster..And I was looking out the window I knew the plane was crashing and I was going to die and I was thinking "Oh my god! I am really going to die in a plane crash!"

And that's all I remember. It just stopped there and I woke up, but I woke up feeling not quite right because the dream was so vivid I was still feeling considerably shaken. Going back to sleep was out of the question so I got up, made myself a cup of tea and watched TV for a few minutes (National Geographic, not the news unfortunately). However, I still couldn't concentrate, I was feeling so restless for no apparent reason I turned off the TV and got my laptop and logged on to check my mail and read the news.

And then that's when I found out that earlier on in the morning, more or less around the time I had the dream, a plane had crashed in Mangalore and almost everyone on board had died.

I believe I had some sort of premonition about the Mangalore crash for whatever reason . Or maybe when the plane was crashing, those poor people inside, their fear was so intense it pervaded the atmosphere, and there I was sleeping, mind free and receptive - radar open technically - and I picked up on the strong emotions in the air?

But whatever, I'm totally freaked out over my Japan trip now as well. I've never ever even remotely been afraid of flying, but now I don't think I'm going to feel confident about stepping inside an airplane. And such a long journey at that :((

I used to have these dream things a lot when I was a kid. Mostly little things, like dreaming about finding a five rupee note near my school gate, and I would find it the next day in the spot that I dreamed about, or dropping my shiny new pencil box and it breaking into pieces and the next day my pencil box falls and breaks into pieces. I was always dreaming clear, vivid dreams, my sisters would kiddingly call me 'Mangnei-i' because every morning I would wake up and say 'I had this dream..' 'I saw this in my dream..' bla bla

And then when I was 17, I dreamt about someone's death. I don't even want to talk about this much it was a very very disturbing incident. And it scared me so much I used to pray every night before I sleep and ask God to not let me have dreams after that. And it's stopped since then.

Well that's all. It's all been so weird and strange I just feel like writing it down. You know something else that's been making me really uncomfortable? I was in the kitchen and the TV was on about the crash, I think they were talking about the top 7 worst airplane disasters or something like that. I could only get snippets, and finally I was done cooking and I went and sat in front of the TV - just when the reporter said "The number one deadliest air crash was in 1985 when a Japan Airlines plane traveling from Tokyo to Osaka..."

It's true I'm excited about going to Japan, but I've been to other places that I was more excited about and I never dream about it this way. I don't have any fear of flying, I can't think of any reason why I would dream such things, I don't know what in my life could trigger my sub-conscious to bring up these things in my dream. Maybe I'm just really psychic.


Anonymous said...

they say that if you have a bad dream - like something bad happening, you should talk about it, tell it to others and it won't come true. so don't worry, nothing's going to happen :)
so when are you coming to japan? let me know? maybe we could meet up?

Jerusha said...

haha I actually thought twice about writing about it because I thought it would be bad luck to blabber about it! That's a relief I'm glad I decided to talk :)

If all goes as planned, we'll be in Tokyo on the 5th next month. We're gonna be staying at the Hotel Nikko, is that anywhere close to where you live? Would love to catch up with you! Keep in touch..

ku2 said...

Well, according to Freudian theory, the fear and the helplessness you felt in your dream actually reflects your desire to let go of inhibitions and control during s...Hah! Totally made that up, but you did mention Freud, and the dude boils everything down to sex :DDD
but I get you, though. I'd feel apprehensive after those dreams too. But dreams (the sleeping kind) rarely comes true, so dont worry about it. And enjoy the trip!

jay-me said...

this a comment thru ku2 lol hope im nt overcrowding, its such a great read, such a novel topic that invites compliments, salute!!! we have a lot in common i guess

mesjay said...

Curious. My sister used to have that kind of dream that came true when we were kids.

Anonymous said...

You can find anything on the internet these days, so every time I have a bad/good dream (Which I still remember by morning), I check out the online Dream Interpreter.
For eg:
According to Freud, feces is related to possession, pride, shame, money/financial matters, or aggressive acts. So to dream that you are playing with feces, symbolizes your anxiety over money matters and financial security.

And for plane crash: (NOI) :p

Jerusha said...

ku - That's not a bad theory :P You know I actually sort of agree with him :P At least the solution seems to be easy - if you were married. But if you're single and unattached..that's a bit of an issue :)

Jay-me - happy to have you on board! Thanks for dropping in, and then thank you too for your kind words.

Jerusha said...

Mes - that doesn't help at all! LOL

Black - haha should I be relieved or should I think I need help immediately? I think to have high and lofty goals is better than to have none and die :P

Nags said...

only one question, which flight are you taking, and when! (wanna make sure i dont take that :D)

illusionaire said...

whoah! Final Destination! Be afraid. Be very afraid!

I'm not helping much, am I? :D

Lucy In The Sky said...

Awiha Jerusha... kan in ang chiah a nih chu! And I thought I was weird!

Let me ask you something...does it always happen the next day after you dreamt and is it always exactly as you dreamt? It is for me (except one anomaly a couple years ago) Thing is though, it's always random and I can't control what I see. I've always wanted to learn more about this thing. It's weird. I want to know why and how I see things the night before they happen.

ku2 said...

heyyy @Jerusha and Lucy: You guys are seriously creepin me out and fascinating me at the same time.. Tell me more...And if you have weird dreams about me dont tell me awrite? :D

Jerusha said...

Nags - we're taking this Friday night's Thai flight. I hope I run into you on the plane :P

Kima - I sual uih kher mai! I hate the entire Final destination movie series. The last one especially. The tire that crushed the girl - still gives me nightmares. Yuck!

Jerusha said...

Luce - you too!? It's sort of mixed for me, the one that clearly outlines incidents usually happen the next day immediately. Then I have some others that are really vivid (when I dream about places etc) and I remember them all the time and then I find myself in a place I keep seeing in a dream maybe years later (and I SWEAR it's no deja vu). Not a nice thing isn't it? My dreams scare me all the time.

Ku- hehe I hope me or Lucy dreams about you soon..

virgochhas said...

ka vannei nge vanduai....my dreams always come out oppsite in real life... :)

a in letling thak zel...mang thra hmuh hi ka hlauh phah...mang chhia makes me happy


ka lo tawngtaipui che nia

go safely and come home safely

luliana said...

Mumang chhe deuh neih chuan "mawng ek i thiar fai lo aniang" kan in tih sak thin kha...enge a inlaichinna le? Thil ho lutuk a inngaisakna a ni thei angem le tiro??!!

Jerusha said...

Pi Rami leh Luliana chu lalKima te comment ai thlawt chuan rilru in ti dam deuh e. Vawiin zan chu mawng ek fai deuhin ka lo thian tawh ang :P

Makettles said...

I first read your blog,'This confusion thats my life'and then on dreams. Can you see a connection? I do . Too much stress, the desire to keep up and 'survive' in the 'global media sales'.
Dreams played an important part in the Bible . So if the recurring dreams are of concern , praying before you sleep is a good step. But then you are already doing it. So knowing you are in good hands go to Japan and have a great time!

Jerusha said...

Makettles, thanks for dropping in and the comforting words! I don't know if my problem if my desire to keep up, or my lack of it :D But you're right about the stress. I AM stressed out. I need this Japan trip badly.