16 July 2008

Oh we the evil sex!

By we, I mean me and all the good women who's got the luck to share the same gender and are reveling in their womanhood, the bearers of the double X chromosome, the soft and beautiful, better-smelling, smarter sex. We are all that yes, but I really do believe that we also possess more capacity to do harm.

Men's lack of general spite, I suspect, springs mainly from the thickness that seems to prevail in their cranial cavities. I'm not saying they're dumb of course. Most of the truly brilliant people I know are all male, but it's also true that I strongly believe (and I'm pretty sure I'm right :D) that I am smarter than most men I've met, while I come across women way smarter than me every day.

(That's just to tick off the men. That's the kind of statement that has high potential to pervade that previously mentioned thickness, and somehow reach the sleeping thing that resides in the cavity, and whisper to it that something has been said that is perhaps eligible for deeper contemplation because it's possibly offensive. Deeper contemplation will take approximately 2 seconds and they will have already lost their temper before those 2 seconds are up).

Other statements of similar potential -
* Let's have sex.
* Oops, I spilled soda on your keyboard.
* He's taller than you are.
* I'm pregnant.

You know, stuff like that. By potential, I mean the ability to kick some of those sleeping neurons into transmitting some sort of chemical signals - the end result is subjective and may vary highly from subject to subject, rage and panic and sexual arousal being one of the more common reactions.

If you want it to resume as it is, you can try saying nothing - always works, or 'Take the trash out,' 'Don't forget to feed the dog,' or even just a simple 'Let's talk.' (I believe peace will reign on earth and in all households if all women can adopt this strategy. After all, didn't someone who must've been pretty smart and who put her brains to good use say something about letting sleeping dogs lie?)

Anyway, I'm straying. What I want to talk about here is how we women can be so much more difficult and vindictive and nasty and....you know, just difficult. I will not even go into the whole animal kingdom stories, we all know those too well already. Let's just try to keep it human(e).

How many stories have you heard about the bride not getting along with her husband's brothers or father? Not a lot, I'll bet. Now, replace the male kinsmen with the female relations. See what I mean? Mothers-in-law are subjects of absolute terror, and the sisters-in-law, at best, seems to excel at frosty dislike or plain indifference.

Personally, putting aside romantic relationships, men have always been my best friends, best comforts, and without fail, make the best company. Because they're easy. Put me in a room full of men and I will be friends with all of them in 10 minutes. Forging friendship with women, on the other hand, is a long, hard struggle for me. Like I said, this may be just personal but I love men that way. I shared a house with 3 guys once, and that was one of the most peaceful cohabitation with more than 1 human being I've ever had.

Another example to prove my point: In my gym, we have two trainers - a guy and a girl. For every set of exercise that I do, my male trainer tells me to do two sets of 10, while my female trainer is never satisfied with less than two sets of 20. And she'd stand and watch me huff and puff, muscles quivering, flesh wobbling, tears and sweat streaming down my face and I would seek her eyes for some sort of sympathy, but it'd only remind me of the villain in the Terminator movie after his flesh burned off and only his metallic skeleton remained, with those two sets of cold, unfeeling, red blinking lights. And I'd think about how she should be in a movie, and how she'd make a good villain, you know those types that carry poison darts in their hair. And blow it on little children for practice.

So I keep wondering why these gentle, warm, peace-loving creatures like us so much, we who have the power to disrupt their peaceful existences, and who would most likely put that power to use - intentionally or unintentionally. Because I think if I were a guy, I'd steer clear of us. And I think I better stop right now and sleep because this is going to lead me back to sleeping cranial cavities and I'd go round and round in circles and never sleep and be red-eyed and mean-assed at work tomorrow.



p.s - Men, don't come accusing me again of being sexist, I love you guys :P It's just the way the thoughts form in my head and my fingers fall on my keyboard :-)

14 comments:

Nags said...

yep, we are evil. and proud of it, i wud say! :D

illusionaire said...

Heeeheheeee... this post sooo reminds me of a group of girls I know from our locality Chaltlang. I have met many such girls like them later too.

They always get together for a bitching session, and lament on how men are treating them wrong (?). They blame men for everything... When a couple break up because one of them was cheating, here's what those girls always say:

If it was the guy who was cheating, then the guy was a lying cheating bastard like all typical men.

If it was the girl who was cheating, then it is still the guy's fault for pushing her to the verge of cheating! :) Ah! women! :)

Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't most of the major wars that led to so many death and destruction caused because of a woman? :)

Good post from you Jer Jer :-)

illusionaire said...

Oh I forgot, there's another version I've been hearing regularly about the above incident...

If the guy cheated because another girl seduced him, those girls say all men are like that, easily susceptible to seduction.

If the girl cheated because another guy started flirting with her, then those girls say all men are like that, ready to flirt with anybody.

Ah. To them, it will never be the woman's fault. lolz.

Jerusha said...

Kim - as you can see, I am willingly taking up the blame. And I am also willing to blame my sisters. If I blame the men, it's only for brain un-use. And even then, I'm still willing to accept that that actually might be better :P See? I'm nothing like your regular everyday feminist.

illusionaire said...

That is why I am surprised and at the same time impressed... When you write about gender issues, you usually end up bashing us Men. This is the first time I've seen a very unbiased approach from you :)

Evangeline said...

I would agree with u wholeheartedly on this. Hmanni lok khan hmeichhe 5 vel nen project kan nei a, it was a nightmare... no-one was willing to listen..while projects with guys went more smoothly coz they at least listen to you

Almost Unreal said...

I have to agree with you

Lucy said...

So right, Jerusha. We are terrible..

Jerusha said...

Yep - but like Nags said up there - we are terrible but most of us are proud of it! :P

DayDreamBeliever said...

:-)

Puia said...

Ekhai, hotunu thin hi chu aw..a ril leh pek raih raih ma nge.. lehkhabu ang reng law law te hian ziak thei la, i hlawk fu ka ring a sin.. i hmel a that ang angin i rilru pawh a that hmel kan tih a nih ber chu..:)

luliana said...

Ngawi vel mai mai teh ang :p

VaiVa said...

Awm ang ti mai ang!

Jerusha said...

boss zorun - Nula a pumpa lawm in kan khi vur vur mai alawm le...anih leh lehkhabu ziak duh te thut ila I lei ve duh angem tih lam hi ani zawk? :P

luliana leh vaiva chu, ngawih lam in chuh dun tlat mai sia, mi rawn hnial deuh tu tur te lo hope ve tehreng nen...