30 April 2007

How Rude!

I don't claim to be exceptionally well-mannered. I don't hold my pinky finger out when I take a sip from my teacup. But that doesn't mean I'm going to lap my tea from the saucer.

I may not be extremely kind or polite, but aside from PMS days, bad hair days, and quality-review days and my reviewer's just told me that I've made one or several errors, I think I'm a pretty laid-back person. But there are some things which people do that bug the life out of me, makes the veins on my neck stand out and my eyeballs bulge out of their sockets and bring out the Miss Hyde in me.

1. I hate people who stare. Hate them with a passion. I've been moaning all my life about how much I hate these people. I wonder if there's anyone alive who hate these people as vehemently as I do.

People who stare. Not like they admire your hair/shirt/bag/shoes/you OR do-I-know-her-stare. But like they want to put you on a petri dish and push you under the microscope.

'Where did this strange-looking creature come from?' they seem to think as they rudely stare full into your face. 'Maybe if I stare hard enough, I'll unravel her DNA.'

'Check out strange-looking creature's strange-looking hair!' One ugly mug whispered to an even uglier mug, and they both stare and then giggle. And I stare back in all my wrath - making three ugly mugs staring the lives out of each other. And I'd so badly want to bash their heads together and spill whatever matter they have for brains on the pavement and let the crows eat it up. (I know, I may be officially homicidal).

Then there are the painfully self-righteous mothers with oily scalps and yellow fingernails who look you up and down like it would be a sin for them not to give mean stares to mean girls, ..ahem, women with torn jeans or clad in any other piece of fabric that isn't at least several yards long.

'I'm glad you're not my son's girlfriend. I'm glad you're not my daughter-in-law.' She'd evilly think.

'I'm sure glad my boyfriend doesn't have a mom like you. I feel sorry for your daughter-in-law.' I'd think back with an even more evil toss of my hair.

Really. It's just the most annoying thing anyone can do. There are always going to be reasons to stare. I'm going to look at you and want to look closer for some reason or the other sometimes, but that doesn't mean I'm going to. That cluster of zit on your forehead might be a subject that cries out for closer inspection, but I will not because you're human too and staring makes people uncomfortable and it's rude to stare and it's just plain not right to stare at people and..oh you know what I'm trying to say.

In an unfortunate case of a staring-attack, the best thing to do is retaliate. This is not something silently seething about can help. Stare back. With all the intrigue and appalling wonder you can muster - 'Look Ma! A starer!! Wait until I get home and tell my friends I saw a starer. Wow! A living, breathing starer!'

*warning* Starers are not often easily-subdued. In the same way that they seem to think staring at people is okay, they also seem to not mind people staring at them. So be ready to be 'up-stared,' 'out-stared,' or even, 'down-stared.'

And the worst thing is that they're everywhere! Out on the streets, parks, buses, at the movie halls where they'll make you think that the movie is being shown on the outside of your frontal lobe.

If things don't get better, as much as I admire the man, I may have to go against Gandhi's passive resistance policy and start arming myself with wooden prongs and table forks. To poke the offenders in their transgressing eyes with.

Or maybe just learn some Shaolin-style, eye-gouging hand moves.

'Stare at me and you lose an eye.'

Or even better -

'An eye for a stare, buster!'

That kind of retaliation. Not just peacefully staring back.

2. There's a girl I know who thinks she's royalty, I'm tempted to think, because of the way she never acknowledges me when I hold the door open for her. I hate people who never say "Thank you" when you hold the door open for them. No matter how 'door-mansy' I may look, I still am not the doorman.

And if I hold the door open out of courtesy, it would be nice if you don't act like it's because I think I'm your subordinate and that you're so superiorly rich or superiorly beautiful or superiorly intelligent or superiorly talented or superiorly classy or generally superior that I'm doing it. I hold it open because that's what I've always done. (I've been known to hold it open for dogs and rats too. I hold it open for a rotten rat almost every day).

In fact, I don't think I even do it out of being good-mannered, but because it's become a reflex to me now. I walk in, see someone behind me..'Oh no, it's her! Don't hold it open, she's going to ignore you and just walk in and away like you were paid to hold the door open for her' - small voice in my head screams. But I still hold it open. I hold it before I even realise I'm holding it. Kick myself kick myself kick myself. Darn. She did it again.

What makes her think she can just royally glide in and disappear. Because next time instead of just 'holding' the door, I'm going to smash it into that royal head.

***sigh*** Feels so good letting off steam. Now wouldn't it be lovely if my starers and royal door gliders could read this and see the light? And wouldn't it be nice if I could really go and smash that door into her precious crown


Jason said...

Gosh! You got me cracked up .. ROTFL..

I'm sure the inspiration for this post goes out to some real hard starers! Get the Table Forks!!

And you know what the best part about the Miss Royalty story is? Opening the door and smashing it into the specimen's crown .. LOL

Hang on, does that mean i cant be staring at the pic in your profile? Oh No! You should have told me earlier! Okay, me getting away from here!

Macabreday said...

i may be wrong...but i have felt that there are more "starers" in Hybad, than in chennai or bangalore.. or maybe they are a lot more obvious in Hybad.

Sundancer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sundancer said...

mac - I agree completely. Of all the places I've been in, Hyderabad has the largest amount of starers. Even Delhi, the city which is supposed to be known as the rudest in the country, can't beat good ol hyd.

Sundancer said...

jason, I just met door glider down the hall on my way to get coffee and she just gave me the brightest smile ever! You think maybe she read this? Maybe I've finally put the fear of the door into her hehe

mnowluck said...

Starers are everywhere!! Pune isn't no better when it comes to starers and when it comes to racial discrimination

I've been to all the four metro and some other cosmos in INdia, when it comes to racial discrimination and all those stuffs, Pune's the worst. I don't say that u don't face all those stuffs in other cities.

But here in Pune, in every walk of life you are discrimated,

F**kers they are too nosy!!

They are wasting their time, criticising the works/walks of other races.

Hey Bruce-Lee's style wud be the best option if ur to choose .. LMAO..

Sundancer said...

mnow - Sorry but I have to differ. Lived in Pune on and off for several years, and I love the city. And in my opinion, Pune is still one of the better cities in the whole country. But that was wayy back in the olden days and I haven't been there in almost a decade now. Maybe its changed for you young uns! ;-)

claytonia vices said...

I was going to suggest smashing the door into her face but you already thought of it... Oh, yeah, can you believe, even guys get stared at sometimes? But of course it is never as often as girls get stared at...

claytonia vices said...

I have noticed that current Puneites are extremely ingnorant of India's geography and it's ehtnic groups. For example, all of south India is one state and Madras (it is still so for many of them) is the capital. This is the first step needed for discrimination and stereotyping!

mnowluck said...

@sundancer: Aha.. if i'm not mistaken, u don't stay here in Pune for long, and ur there in UBS aight?? Good old folks(bible students and their families are there), so they are good.

Totally agree with claytonia

Sundancer said...

Claytonia - yeah I can believe guys get stared at too. I do it all the time :D

Sundancer said...

LOL - mnow, UBS chauh ah chuan ni bik lo e. I know Pune pretty well, but like I said, it was a long time ago.

mnowluck said...

As u differ from my point everytime i make a comment here.. i'll differ with you too.. :)) Because i think i've a better knowledge about the city wat ppl called Pune. cos i've stayed here in Pune for nearly 4 and a half year ...

Pune ah lo awm rawh a nuam teuh lo mai nia.. i se mai ang.. Mumbai ah heti em em hian vai an mawl lo a, Delhi veng thring mahmah e maw kan tih na ah pawh vai ho heti hian an mawl ve lo ... i se thiam mai m??? LOL.. in khua ah a thring viau an nih chuan Pune te chu ngaihsan tur.. :)).. LAughing my fucking ass off

Sundancer said...

mnow - I just said I knew Pune pretty well, didn't say I know it better than you. And what I do know, for the third time, it was from a LONG time ago.

Anonymous said...

I DAM EM? ka dam e? i hlim em? ka hlim ve tho e. I thau em? ka thau khop mai( ka jeans katawt vek).I lerh em? ka lerh e.

Anonymous said...

A chung ami khi keimah sunny ka ni e.

Sundancer said...

Sunny, ka dam e, ka hlim ve tho e keipawh, Aizawl a ka weight rawn gain tlem azawng chu khawlum in a hmet tui ral tranin ka hria..mahse ka jeans chu a nihna tur dik tak ai chuan ka la tawt tho. Ka lerh lo, khua lum ltk hian lerhna spirit pawh hmet chau vek alawm..

Pixie said...

I agree!! I simply HATE being stared at like the way you have talked about! now, you have company for hating 'em! LOL

Sundancer said...

Ah! A sister-in-arms :)

Anonymous said...

Let me put this way, its not just staring, they lecherously oogling us, and its easy for us female to understand what they think - basically they think we are whore, just because we dont put on sarees or salwar kameez, or simply the fact that we are female. I dont know about Hyderabad and Pune, but I was in Delhi for 8yrs and a couple of months in both Chennai and Bangalore, out of these 3 cities I had been to, Delhi the worst, Bangalore the least.

Even if guys from NE get stare, i guess it is not so cheap like the way they give us (female) a lecherous stare.

Whenever i get staring from these #@*tty people, very often i stare them back, right in their eye, as long as they stare at me I stare them, even if it means standing on that spot for a few mins,( for some of you it sounds strange and funny, but i do), even inside a bus i do that, it helps when i start looking at them on their eye and show them on my face i have no fear, they kind of move their eye or go away. But there are also times when it does'nt work!

Once, I travel in a bus, one man was lecherously staring at me all the time and I stare back right at his eye and face, later he still stare at me, so i make a face at him, showing my tongue, slit my eye smaller, pucker my nose. When i did this, atlast finally he move away his head.