07 January 2007

Neil wrote me this.....

If I could reach out my hand and touch you
I'm so fearful that you will wake
If I could only feel your heartbeat
But what magic would that take!

Such a great distance lies between us
More than just miles to go
You are from a different world
One that I might never know.

So I will dream a lonely dream
I'll toss and turn all night
Wishing, praying and hoping
That you are beside me when it is light.

But when light invades upon my dreams
I know that you won't be there
Just the faint remembrance
Of my fingers through your hair.

The one hope I have in this life
Is that tonight you will dream too
Of my arms holding you tightly
Just imagine and it shall be true.

We can dream this dream together
But just one thing for our love's sake
Sleeping beauty, sleeping beauty
They're just dreams so do not wake..

Some years ago, I had this good online friend. He was a soldier in Afghanistan, and he wrote me this poem. 'The syntax is all off' he said, but it looked perfect to me. He knew I liked poetry and he offered to write me one.

'What do you want it to be about?' he asked.

'Love' I said unashamedly.

Even though we were just friends, I was secretly crazy about him. I thought he was perfect. He read the Bible and prayed every night, his favorite book in the Bible was the book of Joshua. 'Jerushah, daughter of Zadok, mother of Jotham' he'd say...And he'd send me pictures of himself in his uniform, and I'd think he was the most handsome man I'd ever seen.

I'd rush home from work and look forward to my weekends so I could talk with him. And I'd go crazy with worry if I didn't see him for a few days, and then he'd turn up, and I'd be delirious with happiness.

...I think he was one man I would never have hesitated to saying yes to if he'd ask me to marry him :-)

Time went on, we lost touch. I forgot all about him and the poem. I was going through my old stuffs and found it again today. It's still beautiful to me. I remember finding the last lines extremely sad, still do.

I was out shopping with my friends in Ansal Plaza in Delhi one day a couple of years ago when I suddenly saw a bunch of American soldiers. It was obvious they were on leave of some kind, some of them were even carrying those sack type things :P around. I shamelessly followed them because I was hoping Neil would be among them. My friends still tease me about it, they said it was the most embarrassing thing they'd ever done [because I insisted on following them, they had to tag along too :-)]

***sigh*** The crazy things men make you do :)...


virgochhas said...

lucky Neil...


bootiful and touching poem...itz puurrfect to me too...

Sundancer said...

pawn thlak e mai :P
he was lucky he had me for a while at least :PPPP

Almost Unreal said...

Neil....rilruah lang thar a mi?

Pavan said...

oh..okay, I guess i am somewhat familiar with Neil and him being in Afghanistan...i can very well understand to what he must've been puting behind this touching poem...

Beautiful post!!!

Macabreday said...


Sundancer said...

unreal - langthar uaih2 e, mi sual han tawn hi chuan mifel tawn tawh te kan ngaihtuah chhuak uaih uiah zel mai nia :P

Pavan - thanks for all those times you lent a patient ear to all my Neil-driven ravings :)

mac - :-) at yA!

Roomana Hukil said...

The poems beautiful enough to say it all..

But if only miracles were for real!

Ya,,if only miracles were for real...

Roomana Hukil said...

Hope u gt ur Neil back sumday....
If only miracles,,were true!!!

If only miracles were true...

Well a brilliant poem,,,loouvved it honestly...

Roomana Hukil..