I don't know what it is about me and misery that I find it so embarrassing to be sad and miserable. Or maybe it's just that someone like me who's shallow enough to be most of the time happy just never learnt how to deal with it. I find it shameful, and pitiful, and weak, and I don't want to admit to it but yes, I'm miserable as hell. I didn't want to write that, but I'm trying to at least be true to the one 'virtue' I can still call mine - truthfulness. I don't want to start pretending or lying now.
And even shopping my ass off and several pairs of new shoes hasn't helped this time. Here, lemme post a pic a friend took of me shopping for shoes. I do wear a lot of heels, and my friend suggested I start wearing those ridiculous block+high heel things if it's height I aim for. Of course, I never bought the shoes, but we had a good laugh trying them on. I call them Red Light shoes :-)
I know I look unfittingly happy in the picture. That's something I've never been able to understand. I pretty much of the time look darned cheerful & gay. Sickening. I think I'm just a big smiley. And that that's how I'm supposed to look. And that's not a beer belly, that's Mizoram belly. Heavy Mizo feasting will give you unsightly middle-aged-Indian-men-belly.You know how people mope, become pale, lose weight, look haggard and all that when they are hurting, well that never happens to me. Big mystery. I think misery suits me, I certainly do spend more time applying make up (for whatever weird reason?!) and therefore, look better.
Anyway, I guess it's not a bad thing for the year to start badly, cos' then the chances of it going up are upped. Thank God for work, and thank God for friends, and thank God for whatever takes your mind off things that make you unhappy. (You can see I'm trying to be brave and strong, and optimistic - but I wish I was a bird and that I could fly away).
11 comments:
i phei khok bun hi hmana Sunitain a lei kha i la hria em?? kha kha min ti hre chhuak, lolzzzzz
whoever said human beings were superior! I want to be a bird too, an eagle and soar up in the sky and still be able to see the snakes on the ground.. How cool will that be
unreal - Sunita i duh chi tak alawm, hei pawh hi a duh leh ngawt ang ani chuan lol
gayatri - I agree. If this is what being superior is all about, I guess I wouldn't mean being a flying unfeeling bird..
I think we all feel miserable once in a while. Yup..I've wanted to be a bird and fly away countless times but I normally end up buying shoes :)
I just got me a pair of sexy black pumps (But not because I'm miserable, not this time:))
Cheers.
hei chu nula ho comment chi a nih hlawm deuh hi mawle.. sawi tur a vang kher mai.. I pheikhawk atang khan rawn chhuk la, kan in be dawn nia..tih te pawh min tihrechhuak..:)
justlookingaround - show pic of sexy new pumps! I'm always glad to see other people that shop and buy shoes to chase their blues away. I'm not the only guilty one. :)
Puia - enge nula comment tur bik anih na. A re re ah ka pheikhok bun chhin chu chhe lo ar ar tiro :D
Mawina Pu Puia sawi chak zawngggg tak a nih hi tiang ang lam chu, a rawn in ti care-lo der vel mai mai a nih hi *grin*
Good garbage post. I always used to equalize all those zillion of shoes every girl has to garbage anyway. A very fitting title indeed *bigger grin*
And I better scoot now before some of your readers fail to see the sarcasm in my comment and think I really mean what I say (remember thaaaat post?) :-P
lolzz, pu kim lehh..:) jerusha hi chu eng pawh bun se, a inhmeh thei mai zelin ka ring.:) Nula in kam sang lo chu an kal nalh theilo.( a ti pu kima'n)..:) in kam sang arh zel rawh u. catwalk pawh i thiam tello maw jeru?..:)
ehe! he ta mi tur hian ani maw BF ah khan ka hmuh che ni!:) he he khami ni khan BF security duty ho poh kha an uluk khop mai kan luh dawn khan celeb 1 in shooting anei mek an lo tia:)lolz
kim - hmeichhe pheikhok ning der peih peih hian bedroom ah an lawm an ti :) and yep, remember 'that' comment :D
puia - LOL! catwalk thiam vang a vanram kai leh kai loh tur chu nise, hremhmun ah ka direct nghal ang!
azz - I va han chhe tak! Nia, hei ka zei lo ltk a, I hnenah ka rawn in train vat angai, celeb te awmna leh kalna hi chu mipui hriat loh zel ani tur an ti sia :P
Hey, I wanna go shopping with you!! :)
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